Friday, March 4, 2011
Here is my preliminary campaign platform:
1) Cricket shall be made the national sport.
2) Pinot Noir shall be re-named "Freedom Noir", and distributed in vending machines.
3) Glenn Beck will be allowed to continue on the air, but must wear a red rubber nose and huge floppy shoes to properly identify his real profession in an accurate manner.
4) The southern half of New Brunswick and the western portion of Nova Scotia as far east as Truro shall be annexed to the US in order to insure a steady supply of Stanfield underwear.
5) Fish Boy shall be appointed Secretary of the Navy..
6) All recitations of the Pledge of Allegiance shall be accompanied by the participants waving around a baggie containing their birth certificate.
7) We shall return to a strict interpretation of the original Constitution, rendering Sarah Palin not only ineligible to hold office, but ineligible to vote.
I thank you all for your vote. Since I will be seeking the endorsement of the Tea Parties, I would appreciate it if anyone having the Koch brother's phone numbers would contact me.
Candidate for President
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Consequently my suggestion to the Republican Party is that they embrace the newer, more youthful form of kinkiness this exemplifies, and I've compiled a potential list of theme songs for the GOP which allow them to both hold to tradition and reach out to the young whips and restraints crowd.
My first choice would be the Deadwood Stage (Whip Crack Away) song by Doris Day.
Then for an even more masculine cowboy themed number (it even has Clint Eastwood!!!) there is the Rawhide theme song
Finally, for the right wing evangelicals here's an old favorite which needs no explanation beyond the title
Monday, November 9, 2009
It's plain to see that the wingnuts are learning an important lesson from the recent special election in NY-23. That lesson is that it's better to be consistently crazy than to win elections. In keeping with this epiphany some random wackaloon in Florida has registered a Tea Party with the Secretary of State.
From my perspective this is most excellent, and I'd like to encourage other teabaggers to set up parallel organizations in all fifty states.
Friday, May 29, 2009
This feature does not seem to be widely used, but recently a few comments have been appearing on my profile page, and two of them in particular caught my attention.
One was from someone who identified him-or-herself as "Phineas Blog site" which leads me to believe the post was in reference to Wingnuts in the Wild. The post is as follows:
"I wish I would have run into you at a teaparty, I would have smashed your camera."
A charming testament to the sentiments of the teabaggers, and reinforcement for my primary rule when I'm threatened outside the bounds of normal political discourse -- "Always press charges". By that I only mean real world threats, to myself or my equipment. The wingnut in question can bluster away on these internet forums.
The second, posted with no name or nym, merely stated:
"You're a sick man, everytime you post your hatred of whites and God is evident. You should be made to sit and watch the 700 hundred club reruns you might learn something."
This one is particularly interesting, since I've never posted anything I'm aware of which was particularly directed at white people in general (after all, I'm white myself). I have pointed out that the GOP and the Teabaggers are overwhelmingly white organizations, which is not a winner on the national political stage given the increasing diversity of the US. And as for hating God, I've only periodically mentioned religion, I'm a churchgoer myself (although right wing evangelical Christians might not accept my credentials, since I'm not a right wing evangelical).
All in all I'm very happy to be getting comments, both the positive ones and the weird stuff (I've yet to get any well measured criticism, which I would also welcome).
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
I'm not good at crowd estimates, but I'd say more than two thousand.
I took a bit over a hundred photos, and will put all of them in a publicly accessible location sometime over the next couple of days (I'm exhausted at the moment, which accounts for the lack of literary flourish and wit in the post).
Friday, April 10, 2009
Arizona State University and School of Vending Machine Maintenance Decides US Presidency is no big accomplishment
Thursday, April 2, 2009
But I have to admit that Ross Douthat really spends some time thinking about why the GOP is in such a deep hole at this point, and what they might do to get out of it.
Here's his brief article in the Atlantic Monthly about the recently released GOP budget proposal.